I was in German class last night and the exercise was to write a postcard to a friend. I know a lot of vocabulary in German but often I’ll go to say something and realize I have a complete blindspot when it comes to knowing the word for something very simple and common.
In my postcard I wrote this to my classmate, George, who’s an Australian expat living in Berlin. She’s cool.
“Liebe George,
ich hoffe diese briefe finden dich. Ich bin in Österreich mit meiner Familie. Sie sprechen Deutsch mit einem dialekt und ich verstehe nur ein bisschen. Wir sind in die Berge gegangen. Es war sehr schön! Und jetzt, ich bin in der Stadt. Ich gehe ins Cafe für Frühstück. Ich verspreche viele Fotos machen für dich! Du bist mein Lieblingsaustralien, nicht Österreicherin! Ich bin lustig. Ja, so, ich sehe dich in eine Woche in die Schule!
Bis dann! Tschüss!
LG aus Österreich,
Kendall”
Anyway it sounds like an eight year old wrote that but I’m practicing different cases (akkustativ/dativ) so I had to write it a certain way. But to the point, as I was writing this, I went to write “I promise” and it occurred to me, I had no clue what the word for “promise” in German is. I asked my teacher and she wrote “versprechen” on the board. I promise I won’t forget that word… get it?
This got me thinking about the premise of a promise. I’ve hung on the words someone promised me. I still take them seriously but I don’t expect everyone to do what they say they will. That kind of thinking has led to a lot of disappointment and resentful feelings on my side. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve been more careful about when I use that word or what I promise. I try to promise what I know I can deliver and I honor commitments better than I used to. I understand the weight they carry and my role in providing someone with an expectation for how I’ll show up. I guess what I’m trying to say is: I try to make promises I know I can keep or have a very good reason why I can’t keep them at this point in my life.
Lastly, I want to express a deep appreciation for those who have made promises to me and have done their best to keep them. I don’t always want to focus on the negative or when people let me down—rather put the emphasis on when people show up for me. And so many people do.